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1.11.07

Somebody kill me.
I think I'm mentally tired.
I think I'm ill.
I think I'm heartbroken.

Being away from my friends felt good.
Japan helped me to stop and think.
Especially standing out in the cold Hokkaido air with my Dad during his cigarette "breaks".
Now I'm back here in this blue armchair.
And I'm feeling these crazy feelings once again.
I can feel the blood roaring and churning in my ears.
I feel faint.
A part of me feels afraid, another feels angry.
I want to hit something.
I want to stab someone in the heart.
And blame him for breaking me.
For breaking all of me.
cb.
No. I'm probably tired.
Sleep is all I need.
Then tomorrow I'll be fine.
And the rest of the day will be okay.
Sleep, Ling, sleep.