In confusion I know You're sovereign still.
In the moment of my weakness,
You give me grace to do Your will.
That means so much to me.
Philippians 3:8 suddenly came to mind.
Open House Day was so tiring.
I hated the weather, and hated the schedules.
People were getting on my nerves.
Deanna and Peizhen were there with me all through the day.
They understood how I felt.
But I didn't.
I stood crying against the marble wall in the shower again.
Hot angry tears.
Angry at myself.
Angry that since my Mum couldn't pick me up, why couldn't I just take a bus home?
I took a taxi home, and I was thinking in the shower:
Some kids don't even have parents to get angry at.
Some kids wish they had parents to love them, but they don't.
Maybe they haven't even seen what their parents look like.
Some kids don't even have the money to take a taxi home, only their legs, and they have to walk at least 3 KM just to get home.
I told God I felt ashamed of myself.
But I felt Him again, and I sang unto Him a love song.
How could God ever love someone like me?
But the fact is that He does, and He'll never let me go, even if I get mad at myself; He won't love me any lesser.
I remembered yesterday's lesson.
And I took a few notes down.
Philippians 3:8 says:
"... I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord ..."
Which reminds me of a chorus of Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus:
"Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of the world will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace."
And last night's lesson:
Write the things of the world off ->
Because I'm BLESSED by them, and I DID NOT EARN them.
So if they're taken away from me, it's okay.
So if free car rides from my Mum are taken away from me, it's okay.
It's only by grace that I have them.
When life is in discord, praise ye the Lord. - Anberlin :)
Jézus
szeret
téged.
-------
Jesus
loves
you.
szeret
téged.
-------
Jesus
loves
you.
