Ryan Koh- for saying that i'm still cool even if I'm fat..
Lewis- for bothering to read my post and tag comforting words.
Vanida- for standing up for me in class.
Charmaine- for saying that "God loves me and so does she" :)
Gerald Sim- for asking how I was after reading my post and telling me what to do next time.
John- for also saying that we kids are forever cool.
Annabelle- for recognising the hurt that the bastard caused me.
And most importantly the One who has been there since the beginning till forever,
God. (no words to describe; He really knows how much He means to me)
I am quite appalled, because that bitch didn't apologise to me.
Dear God, until He apologises to me I shall be disrespectful to him for he disrespected me first. Fullstop.
You know that I have already forgiven him while talking to You last night,
But please do tell him in this lifetime that he has done a very wrong thing which caused me to be suicidal/aneroxic.
In Jesus' name, Amen.
Today we had Chinese oral in the hall.
Vanida was testing me on Conversation.
She couldn't stop laughing because my verbal Chinese really is that bad.
I realised that she can be my tutor or guide for Chinese Oral, if we're ever in the same class next year.
I screwed up my Oral, I think. I was talking crap when the teacher asked questions about smoking.
The floral art competition is tomorrow.
I'm having Math tuition in another 20 minutes' time.
Then Mummy is gonna drive me to Uncle Chris' shop to practice my floral arrangement skills.
It's been a pretty long day for me with more events to come and I won't be online until late at night.
I hope Mr Harrie apologises to me tomorrow.
And if he does, I shall make him do it onstage.
Mr Tan couldn't make it for tuition, he's down with fever.
I'm tired.
Mummy and I just came back from Christanio De Florist.
Spent three hours doing floral arrangement there.
My mind is going to burst any moment now.
The competition is tomorrow.
Note: key words are Competition and Tomorrow.
My arrangement needs balance.
Originality. Creativity. And what not.
But what I really need now,
Is a hug from Jesus.
I just wanna cry and cry because I'm under stress.
I don't wanna live up to expectations, eg. Uncle Chris/Mummy.
But I remember what the church has taught us youths:
"Run the race not only for the prize."
Lord I just want You to know that I'm doing this for You.
You better know it, deep deep down in that beautiful heart of Yours.
If I were in Heaven with You now, I'd hold You and never let go.
Thanks for being my comfort.
I love You more than life.
Labels: expectations
